Study 1: Misunderstandings and Obstacles to Prayer

“Sometimes when we say, "God is silent," what's really going on is that he hasn't told the story the way we wanted it told. He will be silent when we want him to fill in the blanks of the story we are creating. But with his own stories, the ones we live in, he is seldom silent.” ― Paul Miller, A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World

Head

Heart

1. In the video, we talk about four things that prayer is not. Have you been tempted to think any of these things? In what ways?

2. Which of the three obstacles to prayer do you struggle with most? Why?

3. What else keeps you from praying?

Hands

1. For each of the obstacles you came up with, pray that God would help you trust more in his promises than your feelings. Try and get specific. For example:

   “Father, I often feel unworthy to pray to you. I’m ashamed of my apathy and sin. I just screwed up this morning, and the last thing I want to do is come before you. But help me to see that I can boldly come to you because of Christ. Help me to realize the most important thing when I feel unworthy is to come before your throne of grace.”

Study 2: Prayers of Repentance

Read Psalm 51:1-12

Head

1. In verse 1, what is David asking forgiveness for?

2. Why do you think David says, “Against you, you only have I sinned?”

3. What role does David play in his repentance? What role does God play?

Note: All David brings is his acknowledgement of his own sin. God does all the work of blotting out, cleansing, restoring, etc.

Heart

1. When you’ve sinned, do you find yourself wanting to do a bunch of things to somehow restore your relationship with God?

2. Does that match what we see in Psalm 51?

3. Verse 3 says, “For I know my transgressions.” Why do you think it’s important to know your sins specifically instead of just repenting generally for sin?

4. Do you find it easy or difficult to say prayers of repentance to God? Why or why not?

5. When you pray do you find yourself relying on your effort or God’s unfailing love and compassion (verse 1) to experience forgiveness?

6. Are there any sins you’ve not prayed forgiveness for?

Hands

1. Take the words from Psalm 51 and turn them into your own prayer to God.

Study 3: Prayers of Lament

Read Psalm 42

Head

The biblical psalms feature several remarkable expressions of lament. In these laments, the worshiping community expresses grief and frustration at the brokenness of the world, even in situations in which the community is not directly culpable or blameworthy. These biblical laments witness to God’s desire for honesty in worship. No experience in life is too difficult to be brought before God. A lament is an implicit act of faith in which the community of faith turns to God as its only source of hope and comfort. Faith and hope are explicit in Psalm 42, for example, in which the lament “My tears have been my food day and night” leads to a statement of resolute trust: “Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my help and my God” (vv. 3, 5-6, NRSV).

– The Worship Sourcebook

1. The Psalmist longs to be with God, but what situation does he find himself in?

2. What imagery does he use? How does that imagery highlight the suffering of the Psalmist?

3. What are some of the ways the Psalmist uses water imagery? (Hint: look at verses 1 & 7)

4. What do you think the Psalmist is doing in verses 5 & 11?

Heart

1. In what situations have you found yourself doubting God or believing he is far from you?

2. The Psalmist describes tears as his only food. Have you ever been so distraught you lost all appetite? When? What was its effect on you?

3. The Psalmist longs for past days when he worshiped with God’s people at the temple, but now he can’t. Where do you find yourself longing for the past? Why?

4. How do you think verse 5 & 11 speak to that longing?

Hands

1. Lament is praying our pain. Write down a prayer that gives words and images to the pain you feel.

2. Martin Lloyd-Jones said that the answer to the Psalmist’s struggle was that he listened to himself instead of talking to himself of God’s goodness. What promises of God do you need to remind yourself of? Where are you letting pain or fear control you more than you are God’s promises?

Go Deeper

The main trouble in this whole matter of spiritual depression in a sense is this, that we allow ourself to talk to us instead of talking to ourself. Am I just trying to be deliberately paradoxical? Far from it. This is the very essence of wisdom in this matter. Have you realized that most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself? Take those thoughts that come to you the moment you wake up in the morning. You have not originated them, but they start talking to you, they bring back the problem of yesterday, etc. Somebody is talking. Who is talking to you? Your self is talking to you. Now this man’s treatment [in Psalm 42] was this; instead of allowing this self to talk to him, he starts talking to himself, ‘Why art thou cast down, O my soul?’ he asks. His soul had been repressing him, crushing him. So he stands up and says: ‘Self, listen for a moment, I will speak to you’. Do you know what I mean? If you do not, you have but little experience. The main art in the matter of spiritual living is to know how to handle yourself. You have to take yourself in hand, you have to address yourself, preach to yourself, question yourself. You must say to your soul: ‘Why art thou cast down’–what business have you to be disquieted? You must turn on yourself, upbraid yourself, condemn yourself, exhort yourself, and say to yourself: ‘Hope thou in God’–instead of muttering in this depressed, unhappy way. And then you must go on to remind yourself of God, Who God is, and what God is and what God has done, and what God has pledged Himself to do. Then having done that, end on this great note: defy yourself, and defy other people, and defy the devil and the whole world, and say with this man: ‘I shall yet praise Him for the help of His countenance, who is also the health of my countenance and my God’.

– D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones, Spiritual Depression: Its Causes and Cures, pp. 20-21

Study 4: Review

Head

Heart

1. Where do you wish to grow in prayer? For instance, would you like to pray more regularly or with other people? Something else?

2. Of the types of prayers we’ve looked at so far (worship, thanksgiving, requests, repentance, lament) which type do you naturally do most often? Which types of prayers are hardest for you?

Hands

1. With the type of prayer that comes hardest to you, set a timer for seven minutes and pray that type of prayer. Use one of the example scriptures in the previous lessons (or find your own) to help guide you. Don’t be afraid of times of silence or repeating yourself. Simply spend some time exercising your prayer muscles where they seem weak.